Living in Germany taught me that order isn’t just a value, it’s a national religion. It’s a place where the windows are always cracked open (yes, even in winter), the trash sorting could require a PhD, and the dairy aisle is longer than most German novels. Germany didn’t just change how I live and it changed how I think and work. Here’s everything I learned while adapting to a culture built on rules, punctuality, and suspiciously good bread.
Rules Are a Lifestyle
- Ordnung muss sein. There must be order. And there is…everywhere, always.
- Doing laundry after 10 p.m. is borderline criminal.
- Want to cross the street on red? Don’t. Children are watching. Adults are judging.
- “Alles in Ordnung” is Germany’s love language.
- Everyone becomes a hall monitor when it comes to the rules.
- Recycling is mandatory and has more categories than most BuzzFeed quizzes.
- Trash bins have strict schedules. Miss one and you’re living with your garbage for a month.
- You’ll get fined for not sorting your trash correctly. Yes, really.
- It’s illegal to honk your horn for fun. Save it for a real emergency (like someone not using their blinker).
- Public transport works on the honor system…until it doesn’t. Then it’s a €60 lesson.
Social Behavior: Blunt, Staring, and Punctual
- Punctuality is not a courtesy; it’s a survival tactic.
- Germans stare. No shame. No blinking. Just unfiltered analysis.
- You are expected to shake hands more often than you ever wanted to.
- Eye contact when toasting is mandatory. Unless you want 7 years of bad sex.
- Germans will tell you what you’re doing wrong. With receipts.
- Silence is normal. Don’t fill it. Respect it.
- Public toilet? Great. You’re paying for it. Hope you have a coin handy.
- Saying “Moin Moin” will earn you street cred in the north.
- Slippers (“house shoes”) are not optional. You will be offered some.
- The guest bathroom is for guests only. You don’t make the rules.
Food, Drink & Culinary Surprises
- Ice cream is a seasonal obsession. Go big or go home.
- Döner kebab is the real national dish. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
- French fries come with mayo. And you’ll like it.
- Ketchup often has curry in it. Accept it and move on.
- Spargel (white asparagus) season is basically a national holiday.
- Currywurst mit pommes deserves its own section of the constitution.
- Beer is cheaper than water. Priorities.
- You will not find ice cubes. Anywhere. Ever.
- Public drunkenness is more charming here than you’d expect.
- Germans are quietly judging your ability to hold your liquor.
Everyday Life
- Most doors open the “wrong” way. Get used to being confused.
- Toilets have two buttons. Choose wisely.
- You’ll sign 15 documents to open a bank account. They’ll still mail you everything.
- The internet sucks. Yes, still.
- The wind will slap you in Hamburg and no one will acknowledge it.
- Carry an umbrella even on sunny days. It will rain.
- You will check the Deutsche Bahn app more than Instagram.
- Germans love their windows “auf Kipp.” That tilt means air is circulating. Always.
- Luft (airflow) is vital. It’s practically a civic duty to crack a window in every room.
- Sunday is for silence, boot-polishing, and pondering mortality.
Things I Didn’t Expect (But Loved)
- Public transport works, until it doesn’t. But it still beats driving.
- Germans don’t do small talk, and it’s refreshing.
- Guest toilets are cleaner than your Airbnb.
- Fresh herbs are sold in pots and treated like house pets.
- You’ll end up with more dairy in your fridge than you thought possible.
- Germans are obsessed with their boots. There are tutorials. Many of them.
- Everyone has a Fischbrötchen hangover story. If you know, you know.
- Licorice is everywhere. Why? No one knows.
- Bike lanes are sacred. Step into one and feel the wrath of a teen on a fixie.
- The moment you start to love it here, you’ll find yourself sorting your trash with pride.
Living in Germany didn’t just make me more punctual or better at sorting recyclables, it changed the way I move through the world. I learned that structure doesn’t kill freedom, it creates space for it. That silence can be comforting. Those rules, when followed with precision, allow life to unfold with surprising ease. And even when the Wi-Fi sucks and the staring gets weird, Germany will challenge you, sharpen you, and, if you let it, soften you in the best way.
Do you have any fun memories of cultural differences?
