There’s a strange intimacy that comes with aviation, commercial or private. You watch people in transit, between places, masks half-on. You see how they handle stress, freedom, boredom. You see them before big meetings, after hard losses, during honeymoons, hangovers, medical emergencies and heartbreaks.
You’re not in their world but you orbit it. You’re the calm in the corner. The one pouring coffee, resetting a tray table, making sure the cabin feels more human than hollow.
And somewhere between pre-departure mimosas and cleaning up turbulence-induced spills, you start to really see people.
Here’s what working in aviation, both commercial and private, has taught me:
1. People want control even when they pretend they don’t.
In economy, it’s someone losing their mind because they didn’t get the aisle seat. In private aviation, it’s a billionaire panicking over what brand of almond milk is onboard.
People don’t really need things to go perfectly, they just need to feel like they’re in control. Travel strips that illusion away. So they grasp for anything: a specific seat, a boarding order, the garnish on a salad.
It’s usually not about the snack. It’s about anchoring themselves.
2. Manners don’t always come with money.
I’ve had wealthy private jet clients go out of their way to thank me, and some of the warmest, most respectful people I’ve served flew basic economy.
Some of the coldest flew with assistants and an entourage, while some of the neediest and most thankless passengers were the ones flying with a $49 ticket.
I’ve learned not to expect the best or worst treatment just because someone does or doesn’t have money or power or fame.
Money amplifies who someone already is. It doesn’t upgrade their character.
3. People want to be seen without being exposed.
On commercial flights, a glance and a smile can make someone’s day. On a jet, some clients want you to know their exact water temperature without having to ask.
Everyone wants to feel known, but few want to feel exposed. The art is in reading the room:
Do they want conversation, or just someone to notice the subtle nod when they’re ready to land?
Do they want connection or quiet?
Do they want warmth or invisibility?
4. In silence, the truth shows up
Commercial flights are noisy: babies, boarding calls, seatbelt dings. But private flights? Quiet. Sometimes eerily so.
And in that silence, people open up. Not with words but with presence. A sigh. A real moment with their kids. A look out the window that says more than a full conversation.
If you can listen without hearing, you’ll learn everything.
5. Everyone is Searching for comfort
It doesn’t matter if they’re flying coach or charter, people want the same things:
- To be treated kindly.
- To not feel like a burden.
- To be able to exhale.
Comfort isn’t just a warm cookie or a Coke in a crystal glass. It’s emotional. It’s someone bringing you tea before you even ask. It’s not having to repeat yourself. It’s feeling seen.
6. Some people carry calm. Others carry chaos..
You feel it the moment they board. Some passengers walk on like a thundercloud, loud, snapping, pacing, barking orders for you to stow their bags. Others bring a kindness that restores your faith in humanity on a commercial flight.
In both commercial and private, energy is contagious. You learn to hold your own so you don’t absorb everyone else’s turbulence.
7. Details matter. Always.
Whether it’s folding a napkin the right way or remembering someone prefers lime to lemon, details shape the whole experience.
I’ve watched people’s shoulders drop in relief because I remembered they don’t eat pork. Or because I handed them a warm towel at the exact right moment.
The difference between good service and unforgettable service? Details that say: “I was paying attention.”
8. Privacy is the real luxury.
In private aviation, people pay five figures for one thing: not to be watched. They want control of their time, their image, their messiness.
In economy, it’s the person trying to cry quietly in row 23. Or the couple whispering about a miscarriage in row 18.
Everyone, no matter their income, wants privacy when it matters. Not isolation. Just space to feel without judgment.
9. Your energy is your authority.
In both worlds, I’ve had to navigate tension. Calm down panic. Handle conflict with grace.
Private aviation taught me to speak with my eyes. Commercial taught me to hold the line with a smile.
Neither job is about being a servant. It’s about being unshakable. You walk tall, move with intention, and let people know you’ve got this.
10. People remember how you made them feel. Always
They’ll forget what you served, where they sat, or even which jet they were on.
But they will remember the calm you brought into the room. The kindness in your tone. The sense of safety when the sky got rough.
My Take Away
Flying taught me that people are walking contradictions: powerful and panicked, guarded and desperate to connect, polished and painfully human.
Whether jetting to Ibiza or flying standby to see a sick parent, everyone is just trying to get somewhere without falling apart in the process.
And if I can make that journey feel even a little bit easier? Then I’ve done more than just fly, I’ve made someone’s world a little softer for a few hours.
